The Strange Case of Introverts

One of the most easily spotted faces in a crowd  is that of an introvert. His eyes stare continuosly to the ground , back straightened, sulky faced as if he lost some hundred pounds of gold, his lips don’t move much unless he feels its necessary to speak. They believe being silent for them is the next form of communication.

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I, like all extroverts, tend to talk much & listen little, moreover we actually listen to talk, the common sarcastic truth. And when we speak to people about us or on anything global trending stuff, we want other’s opinion. We secretly wish they too think the same and treat things like we do, acknowledge our claims & find resemblance in our thoughts.

An interesting facet of being social is that we get to know about not only people with whom we are conversing but also also know their opinions, beliefs on other people, their works’, or on things of genuine interest.

Particularly, in the case of introverts, we extroverts get easily disappointed because of their dis-inclination to chatter,& giggle with us. They just love to listen to our life’s randoms. But if you are expecting a reply from them, either you need to skip your query or change your company.

Keeping quiet seems like a boon to us. It sure is a potential weapon. But there are times, you need to voice up your concerns, for none is a mind-reader.

Once so it happened, during my school time, my bestie persistently beckons me . Being bit busy I tell him to wait & chat later. We couldn’t talk that entire day & then at home, I get this mail saying he was upset ; so thought chatting with  me might make him feel better. But how was I to know what the hell happened with him.

Now, a word of caution for all introverts, we aren’t know-alls ;so please convey your messages through words not gestures.

A most peculiar quality of introverts is that they hate talking on cellphones. And blimey, every extrovert absolutely loves this. Isn’t? Next time, call one of them up , say hi & wait for their reply; they’ll reply in most boring tones, you’ll feel as if they’re half asleep. Utterly irritating right but that’s how introverts really are, way too irritating.

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They talk to a very few people outside their family whom they find interesting. They are allergic to human contact, so they tend avoiding  it. But to few people they converse regularly with, they reveal their funny witty side & entertain them. Some introverts even think they can be more funnier than extroverts, a contrasting fact which I feel obliged to challenge.

They get emotional for the few people they know & for rest, completely devoid of emotions. By unknowns means that category of people they never interacted & those with whom they are not interested to interact.

A introvert friend reveals this:                                                                                                          During a long journey, all extroverts kind of talk to people next to them in train & we are like if someone says us hello we think – “oh crap why?? What’s the need of this?? Now this person will bore me throughout the journey.”

One reason they specify that if they said hello, then it falls on their part to keep the conversation going by thinking of some common topic interesting to both, the speaker & the listener. But when other people start, they know exactly on what points they need to focuss while talking to make their conversation seem interesting.

They adjust themselves according to others & then talk the way their listeners wish them to. This way, they never bore their listeners & even can manipulate them to talk more which becomes a kind of win-win situation for them.

Another thing which makes me quizzical is their love for digital conversations. They are avid online chatters, they talk more than most talkative extroverts. This & in lot other ways, understanding introverts intrigues me time and again.

Planning-Listingthe endless routine!!

“Whenever you sit down to study, foremost of all, you need to make a timetable. It will make sure that you gave equal justice to all your subjects within a bound time limit.”, my papa reminds me this every other day. He even does a bit blackmail saying that all good students make routines, stick to it like a gum. They make their notes, they discipline themselves, so should you.

When the first time, I had heard these words, I had literally followed his advice word to word. At times, it did not work precisely but then, I knew how to manage and juggle between the specific time bounds.

Time management comes to you more out of practice than any hidden art. I’m surprised till date how I used to do it before. Because now, I am spending more efforts in planning and listing than actually getting the work accomplished.

I sought help from one of my respected , all students’ favourite zoology lecturer, “ In what way I could achieve more efficiency in my work?”; to which he just said, “When you’ve tried working according to your timetable, you have got 20% of the job done. If you wouldn’t even plan things, then you’ll have nothing at your stake.” I got illumined, got a new perspective to hold on to when I get stuck.

I not only plan and work but also analyse why I couldn’t finish a task. It shows me why an assignment was left un-attended to when I could have completed it,etc.  And then I try to modify my approach to get things done.

When your to-do things don’t work, rest assured because either you are planning un-realistically or you are not working.

Sometimes, I think why is that everytime we have got to make a time table, and follow it like an animal, trying to catch things alongwith it (I mean finshing things as per the time). But then, the answer is obvious, we do it for our betterment, at the end, its gonna pay us, none else.

Let me make my creative list this instant:

  1. Am never gonna stop reading stuff
  2. Will try my best to write (although sometimes I myself feel my writing gets repetitious and sucks!)
  3. Complete one book per month, whichever genre, just doesn’t matter (inculcating a habit is much harder isn’t?)
  4. Quora, lifehack, Wattapad, let my exams get over, I’ll be soon there.
  5. WordPress, don’t worry, you’re next to home, although I haven’t still figured out how bloggers connect here.
  6. Going to work on my first book soon, people please support .

I’ll be putting the first chapter for review soon, don’t forget to review.

Who makes such a list, its more nonsensical than my words. Never mind. I wrote in a way I’ll want myself to do.

P.S. Continue supporting this lone blogger, means a lot to me buddies. Every article is 3-4 min read. Bookmark this site if you like.

A Few Words to My Younger Self

What was the first thing you learnt before walking? Simply walking. No right? First, you learnt how to get up, stand steadily, then tried to take the ‘first step’. You tried but your baby legs made you fall. What did you do then?

You laughed aloud, you clapped. Isn’t? Again you took another step, this time you steadied yourself a few more seconds. This process went on everytime you made an effort, till when you fully learnt walking.

We all know this. But tend to forget that this is applicable to all new things we come across in life.

Mistakes happen. Its natural. It’s a proof that you have given your effort. This should not make you feel guilty, cause self-pity or refrain from trying a second time.

Rather we should analyze how better could we have performed that thing, then just remember the solution and move on to start all over again. If the second time too, you made a mistake, observe that it will be less in intensity than the first one. By doing a thing repeatedly, we learn ‘perfection’.

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Your thinking and working should be proportional to each other. When you go on thinking too much, say to yourself to “Stop thinking, and start working”.

And you need not work hard, just work sincerely. When you start doing, everything will start falling in place without you having any time to complain. You would not even realize for you will look at it as a miracle.

When you think if your circumstances will ever change, ‘persevere’.

Because-

“Nothing is consistent. Bad times change for better, just like the change of seasons.”

Babyy you are strong, born to FLY. Never think you are nothing. Nor think you are everything. You are ‘something’ and can do something.

Don’t hurt yourself. Don’t get attached to people or circumstances. The things that are yours, you need not  force it to stay with you, possessiveness is not required. Give people space, time. If they are yours, they will remain with you.

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Stop judging people through your assumed glances. Sometimes, people give ‘surprises’. And when people don’t , then ‘life certainly does’. Miracles do happen, that only thing is you got to believe in it. (by  Winsome Perceptions)

Go on searching for happiness and loveliness in every little thing you encounter. Smile is contagious, so is laughter. Share it, spread it. It will only come back to you at double the amount you gave.

When you realize that something is not growing you, abandon it. Doesn’t matter if it’s a person or a thing. You should be more important to yourself than any other thing.

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People are not really what they seem to be. So, its better to ignore and turn a blind eye to their activities that goes against our expectations.

Someone had told, learn to expect, not to doubt. But you know, expectations itself bring doubts. Rather try ‘hoping’. You’ll start seeing possibilities. It need not happen. But if it comes true, you’ll be overwhelmed with happiness.

Remember, FLY. (First Love Yourself)

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Dubious thoughts…..musings of a guy (a brief tale)

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I have been waiting for 3 days 9 hours 52 seconds but look, there is still no message. Does she even care for me? No, it cannot be like this. She will reply, I’m sure.

Oh God, let her message me just once. If she doesn’t then what shall I do? I can’t think of anything clearly. Lets leave thinking this far.

Till now, we were in good terms. Then, why suddenly this had to happen? Why ‘he’ had to interrupt in the middle?

What the fuck ‘he’ has done?

Just a week before now, we used to talk a lot. She used to message me within seconds of getting my message. But now, she either replys late or doesn’t reply. And that too, when I start the conversation, she talks or else she wouldn’t.

She doesn’t message first from her side. Why is she treating me like this? She should care about me. Because I care so much for her.

Earlier, when we used to talk, V used to tell me all random things but now, she says nothing.

I know she doesn’t care for me anymore. Because her ex has come back into her life na, that’s why.

I’m this much serious about our relationship but she doesn’t give a damn.

Even if I cry, it won’t matter to her. Has she started distancing from me? But why?

No, she can’t do this. I’m sure she will talk to me.

We have shared so many things with each other. Doesn’t it count? It does.

The last time we met, we couldn’t talk properly. Because we were in the public. And she had revealed that she couldn’t talk to me in the public. Fine, its okay.

If she doesn’t want, then I wouldn’t ask her.

I have waited for so many days, months to ask her if she loved me.

But then, if I ask and she says no, what shall I do?

Already once it has happened with me. I asked a girl in 12th who said ‘no’. I had felt so heart broken then.

I had become a laughing stock before my friends. I had got hurt so deeply then. Hence, I do not want it to happen again.

Actually, why the fuck I gave that first girl that much importance, I can’t think.

V is so much better than her. Not only better, she’s the best. I have never met a girl like her before.

I have fallen in love the second time. “Can love happen twice?” as it had happened with Ravinder Singh?

Should I ask V now or should I not? I’m not sure if I should ask.

But if she said no, then I would get depressed again like before it had been with me once.

I’m filled with hurt. I want to cry. But there’s no one here who can understand me.

Mine is a twice failure love story. I know, no one will understand me.

Okay, leave this. Lets rejoice in the meanwhile.

But still, I do hope she has cares for me.

The day I’ll never forget……

Once upon a time, it so happened……

Way too old fashioned.

This was the day of my ‘calling’. I remember every bit of it so vividly. The scenes of anxiety, curiosity, excitement, achievement dance on the screen of my mind’s eye even today like it had happened just yesterday.

Moments of stupidity, astonishment , triumphant retreat all woven together make up the ‘blest’ day of my life. If I had known, that someday, I would be writing about this day, I wouldn’t have believed. But destiny had wished otherwise.

Mrs. U, my English teacher had given me this opportunity. And I shall remain indebted to her for this till my last breath.

There was a competition day organized by NIST, Brahmapur. The areas in which one could take part were several. There was art competition, like painting, poster-making, quiz competitions, etc.

The quiz competition was held at the end and it was the best among all the competitions. Since everyone could attend it, being in the audience section. The questions were a mix of intellectual and funny categories. And we, as the audience, had a lot of fun, seriously.

Now coming back to my narration, I had wanted to go in the poetry section because I loved writing poems and wished to try my chance in this field.

Sadly, as always, that idiot of a S interfered. S was my most irritating enemy. He was the boy of one of the most popular and senior teacher Mrs. A. And in DAV, children of the staff got every possible benefit they could.

Mrs. U was fond of me and so she wrote my name against the poetry section. Now the problem was that S too loved writing poems and so when he demanded, she was forced to strike off my name and enter his. You know, Mrs. U was actually new to our school and this Mrs.A had already worked for almost two decades. So she out of fear or respect whichever had to act this way. After that, being a concerned teacher, she tried to console me too.

But I wanted to take part in any section so that atleast I get a participation certificate. That time, CCE was in place and we had to work more in extra curricular activities. So, mam made me go in the short story writing competition.

I was filled with anguish but what could I do against such gross open forced partiality.

Now on the day of competition, I was feeling nervous a lot because I hadn’t ever in my life tried writing , leave alone story.

At the maximum, I had written a mere few pages in my journal, that too, if you are to judge, it will be negligible before what I can write today.

We all had experienced a grand day. We saw the whole campus of NIST, its very very big, you know. It has many buildings whose names are really fantastic, there is ‘OCTAGON’ which is the library-cum-dining hall ; then there is ‘GALLERIA’ ; and there’s the boys’ hostel . You ought to see those. Seriously, even the hostel’s view from outside was majestic. There were windows of glasses on the entire front side. Then they had kept dogs (different breeds) , there were emus , the small sized hares. There was the ornamental garden, xerophytic garden and what not.

Now,one by one, the competitions were getting over. I remember we, the story writing participants were shown into our room, by the ‘EUREKA’ club members. We were provided sheets, a pen and a topic read on the green-board –

“ As Nancy awakens to her new world……………..

After this, we had to continue and finish the story. I till today can’t say how I made up the story, purely imagination, creativity or just by chance God made me do that.

My plot was similar to any other article you’ll ever find in the newspaper combined with that in a film.

That girl,Nancy ; she goes infront of a mirror but doesn’t recognize her reflection. She has lost her memory. She enquires everyone who is she, where is she, somebody tells her how they found her. She then gradually remembers her past . The molestation she was tortured into, when she went to meet her boyfriend-cum-fiance . She then remembers her parents, she thinks they will be worrying about her, she remembers herself. Everything becomes crystal clear to her now. She wishes to go home as soon as possible.

So, this was precisely that story. I wished to keep that with me as a memory of my first story but those volunteer over there didn’t allow. I’m so happy now that I’ve remembered it almost lucidly.

The prize distribution was held in the main hall where the quiz had been conducted. That was the last part of the day. Categorically, the first three rankers were awarded with a seal alongwith the certificate.

I knew I can never make it but still, I wanted to hope a bit. You know, dil toh baccha hai ji, it doesn’t understand. Now, the anchorer utters, “ the third place for short story writing goes to………

My hopes get up but then she names a student X.

Okay, I knew I wouldn’t make it.

“and the second goes to………

Is it me? Is it me? My heart wishes so much.

And this prize goes to a Y.

Not the second, not even a third, first? , can’t even think in my wildest dreams.

A voice calls out through the speaker “ the first prize goes to SUSMITA TRIPATHY from DAV.”

Whose name she said? I’m not sure if I heard correctly.

Am I mistaken?

“Susmita Tripathy, come to the dais.

Susmita from DAV………

I hear it again, yet again.

My limbs have got cold. My legs have got wobbly, unable to budge. I’m struggling even to walk.

Even narrating this is causing goosebumps in me.

I walk down the stairs from my bench towards the dais, my walk is very unsteady, I’m afraid I might fall. Please God, let no one observe me. I’m physically present but my mind is not working.

I’m clueless. What did happen. I’ve become immune to human senses.

I have reached the dais, got the first seal in my life, and I’m struggling to smile at the photographer who’s there to capture the most privileged, yet in a way, awkward moment of my life. Because I had never expected this.

Indirectly S not only helped me achieve this but also this was the day, I finally had to believe what was I made for. I’m grateful to my most irritating enemy. He made me know my area of talent.

Someone rightly said, the wrong people teach you the right things in life.

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The tug-of-war between good grades and students

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Today we live in a world where scientific developments, industrial revolutions , etc have reached their zenith and are trying to discover lots of other scopes where they can excel. We all are continuously striving towards excellence in every aspect of our lives. Be it in studies, or society, we try for securing the best position for us.

Decades back, graduation was considered as the highest degree one can achieve and those people were respected. But now, even post graduation is not a sufficient criteria for excellence. We have to go beyond that. Seriously, what have we done?

I, myself when completed , what we previously called metriculation, I wished to feel grateful that a substansive part of my educational life got over. Holy Mary! Today, even after completing my 12th , everyone says “Beta, your career has not yet started. You still have a long way to go. Study more, get more degrees, bla bla bla.” They are right, even you will agree but it sunks low my optimism.

Is studying, an easy job? Nay. If this would have been the case, then everyone would have made a library not only in their localities but also in their homes. And everyday, from dawn to dusk , would have stuck with ‘books’. But this isn’t the case.

If you are thinking I’m exaggerating, then you have my apologies. And I would be glad if you stop reading this moment.

But everyone studies because in today’s world, studies have become a ‘necessity’ like our basic requirements. There was a time, people said being ‘literate’, knowing one or language perfectly, which is, being able to read, write, interpret and able to do basic arithmetic was the order of the day. Presently, these things no more apply.

Lakhs of people, students, get into engineering, half-hearted, but they do because either they are choiceless or have to complete their studies early and run for jobs. I’m saying this on the basis that one, the chances of getting into engineering colleges is easier than medical colleges and two, nobody gets into medical half-hearted.

When we were in school, there was a tug of war for better percentages. Even the dot something mattered, decimals man, you get me?  As we grew up, now there is a race for better grades, O-E-A ; learning the alphabet was much easier.

The CGPs, SGPs, overall average CGPs; whatever they imply, they try to make us put us kinda life and death situation, telling us to put maximum efforts, and work consistently. And when the results come, it comes in the form of a roller coaster ride, ups and downs ; ups and downs.

On the bright side, studying more and more opens up a wide range of avenues for you to pursue your choicest careers and interests. The returns are equally rewarding, getting successful financially is the major part. Others include, respect, name-fame and all those stuff. You status increases among your kins, your standard of living increases making you most satisfied in life than ever.

So, the overall conclusion is Studying is essential, to the mind (knowledge), to the soul(self satisfaction), to the body(comfortable life, getting whatever you desire). Here’s quote by a well known motivator that I’ve pasted on my study-wall.

“ Feeling is good, do it

Feeling is bad, do it.”Sandeep Maheswari

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Because  at the end :-

                      “You do not get what you want

                           You get what you are.”Sandeep Maheswari

The best time to write !

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Early morning? 60-90 minutes after waking up? Well, it doesn’t work in my case. I’m saying because I have tried it more than a couple of mornings.

One day I got up, reminded myself that I have got to write 500 words, freshened up a bit, headed for my room, turned the system on, sat there like a statue excited to begin. And believe me, I got carried away in a myriad of thoughts but I couldn’t get started.

I kept asking myself, “ Hello, buddy! You wanted to write now, so where shall we begin?” “Any ideas?”

“Nope,old pal. I’m not getting anything. Please let’s skip this.”

“Yeah, okay, then what about your goal?”

“Hell your goal, I don’t care.”

So that’s how it went for quite half an hour or so until when I quit trying. That’s why. I’m saying, this writing ‘thing’ in the morning doesn’t suit to the likes of me.

I rather like to write at night. Since night-time is quiet, peaceful, and your ‘hither & thither’ running thoughts don’t distract you. You only think of the priority oriented. So its more easy.

Somebody said you shall have a “writer’s high” throughout the day if you write in the morning,but I personally don’t quite agree with it. I believe I’ll have a “writer’s high” (whatever that means) for a entire week at the minimum if I wrote something now.

Motivation is not something ephemeral. It stays on for a few days in such cases.

For majority of people, exactly writers, lack of time is highly responsible for their negligence to write. It’s true there, everyone gets so busy in their businesses, jobs, etc that their state of mind remains at a highly excited mood. They get stressed easily, lose motivation to work easily. The reason for this, maybe their workload or failure of people to appreciate their work that makes them to willfully under-perform.

Then, how am I able to? Well, “I’m not working, I’m still studying.” Yup, the usual facebook status of folks like me, ‘students’. I find this line very funny, I think what the person wishes to say. Is he declaring like or just rhyming the affirmative, whatever,frankly,  its ridiculous.

You might be thinking that I’m blabbering un-necessarily. Well, that’s just what I have got to do today. Think, write till I hit the bull’s eye, ‘target’ you know.

I prefer to write like we are both in a conversation. The reason is I hate being alone. Talking self to self, yeah some people do, even me at times but if you are gonna see that person actually doing it, you are gonna feel like “Hullo, is that guy mad?”

I don’t have any specific topic to write upon. Today’s prompt was to kinda justify that morning is the best time to write and how can we all keep track of us if we are really doing it or not.

But I already told you that I don’t like to write in the morning in the first place. Presently, I’m thinking that one fine day like today, I’ll be losing all my words and from that day, I’ll have nothing more left to say. My word page shows 549, I made it. Hope to continue tomorrow.